There was a time when I did not think life was worth living. I was struggling with life and saw little hope for my future. I felt that I was failing at so many things that were important to me. I knew that people I loved were upset with me and I was questioning everything I ever thought to be true. I was surrounded by so much negativity that I became more and more depressed. I started forgetting things and then I would panic. I had strange sensations like thinking it was raining as if drops were falling on my body and then realizing I was indoors. It turned out it was all stress. Years and years of stress I pushed away. And whenever I would forget something or say something stupid, my family would all tease me thinking it was funny, I guess, but it wasn’t funny to me. It would make me feel terrible it would make me feel “less than.”

It wasn’t until I made a conscious decision that I had to get away from all the negativity and reduce my stress so that I could get better and heal that I did heal and get better. The strange sensations stopped, the anxiety got better, And I stopped forgetting things and panicking. My relationships improved and I looked forward to my future. I had a new lease on life.

It doesn’t mean that the tendencies to be anxious, worry, panic, allow negativity, and to stress aren’t there, but now I know that I need to keep them in check. I allowed my concern for others to overwhelm my own health to the point that I would rather die than face it.

If you love your family, you must take care of yourself even if it means you have to tell them that you need to be a priority for a time. If they love you they will make you a priority and if they don’t, they don’t deserve to be yours.